Thread: How to talk to this cute girl in my college class?

Originally Posted by 87IROCZOWNER69

But on the other hand OP does need to either talk to her or leave it alone, no need in dragging this out.

that is what i've been trying to say.. just came out a little weird.. and rude maybe..

Originally Posted by Schmidty

that is not you... no way.. hahahahah

I have no reason to lie. *****es love my snuggles.

i love your snuggles.....
i should say.. i'm not that small of dude either.

Honestly. My point is that women are intimidating..but you are the man here.

If they won't give you the time of day to even TALK then they're a **** and don't deserve your time anyways if they can't see past the packaging over the product. You can't always judge a book by the cover. It's the contents that determine what's what.

OP will have to believe me..because honestly, I have had my share of nines and tens (to me, everyone likes different stuff. Might not be what you're into but the point is that there's **** I've been scared of that I just sacked up and moved forward) and I've had regular girls too. Honestly.. It doesn't come from being a vagina. It comes from confidence. You just gotta tell yourself you're the ****. Period. Don't be a cocky asshole but be real. Be interesting.

Another thing that helps is when you're with girls.. absorb EVERYTHING.

Listening is key. If you can learn their interests and have things to input in conversation, that's twice the stuff you can talk about. And then you can get them into cars if they are a decent individual since their thought is "if he's into my stuff I will try his" and that's where you will have a blast doing what you love with someone you're into.


Even if the subject seems retarded to you when they are talking to you, it's something new you can learn..especially if it's their main hobby or whatever. An ex of mine was a cosmetology student and now is a licensed beautician as of a few months before we broke up last year. I know more about hair nails and makeup than any guy ever should. She learned cars, I learned that. That was the agreement.

When my gf and I were first dating she was telling me about makeup and then "you don't know that, you're a guy" , and when I began rattling off **** she was mind boggled. We went to a store that carried MAC (if you don't know, it's high end ****. Lipstick is like thirty bucks..) anyways, you can try on the makeup..they have makeup artists who put it on for you. Their makeup artist was doing stuff wrong. When I asked "why don't you do it X Way", both my gf looked at me and the artist. "You're a guy what do you know about that?" Her manager came over , bet me I couldn't do better. So..we stripped the makeup off and here's what happened.







Everyone was impressed and now the gf knew there was something she was into that I was familiar with.

And in the same breath.. she got under my car and did my oil change five thousand miles ago and she looks great in a oily greasy jumpsuit.

We met on plenty of fish, talked for a week before meeting. I was terrified but I had confidence, smooth talk, a lot of topics of conservation and a spotless car.

My point is that if you find you don't have
A lot of confidence, take it upon yourself to learn new things, talk a ton and if you want someone, there's other alternatives instead of sitting at home lonely or going out with your friends all the time. Everything here will do nothing but help you.

damnit Eric.. you gotta the answers.. publish that ****!!!

The whole point is that even when you have confidence issues, you gotta put them aside and work through it SOMEHOW.

People with balls get what they want in life. Nobody ever got anywhere just talking about something, it's about doing it.

With the way I am, I'd sooner suggest finding her on FaceBook and if she has mutual friends with you, you're already ahead of the game. You can bull**** your way in and be like.. "Hey, aren't you the girl in my _______ class? You came up on my suggested contacts based on who we both know mutually." Ask some sort of question following that, whether it be asking "What's up", "how's it going", or "I'm nervous about this assignment at hand" and it'll open the door for conversation. It won't seem awkward to her which is key and (if she's a decent human being who can talk to anyone without issue) it'll get your foot in the door, period.

Being a big guy and having confidence issues myself, I can tell you it's much easier to hide behind a screen and get the ball rolling. I will tell you a lot of the females I've met have been through online dating. I don't think it's any different than going somewhere and talking to someone, because in the end you're still talking to them. They can't see the nervous looks on your face or that you're jittery or this or that. They just see typed out words and it's much easier to make conversation. From there, you can talk, learn their interests, and skip that whole awkward first meeting thing and then when you do meet for the first time in person, you're that much further ahead in the game with her. In their head, they see that you're talking, you aren't nervous and when they meet up with you, it'll also be much more comfortable with them. The name of the game is comfort. Women will do a lot when they are comfortable around you.

When I'm giving advice to friends who don't have any real experience because they're scared, I just explain it this way. Your three C's you need.

Comfort. Confidence. Common grounds.

If you have these, you can get anywhere with 98% of the females out there.

And if it's just a female in general he's after then he can just skip this bull**** and go straight to online dating with that said.. Honestly, I won't hesitate to admit that between my ex (July 13) and this girl (October 6ish) , I met up / banged 8 different girls in that time frame and did much more with others. While they might not have been the one I ended up with, it kept me busy and without that lonely feeling. I don't know his situation , but the computer might be a better alternative.. thus my "sack up and do it"

Doesn't matter how you do it, long as it gets done. That's my take.



Keeping in mind that this is coming from a guy who looks like this and can get what he wants. ^

That's how you know the game plan works.

edit:

there's no other real advice to be given. swim or sink time.

^^^^ a guy who actually knows what the **** is up! damn! OP needs no more advice as he said....

Eric hit the nail on the head.

If he can't do that then he's a forever alone beta.

So here's how I go about things. Especially at parties.

Me: hi I'm andrew.
Her: hellow I'm (her name goes here)
Me: nice to meet you. How are ya
Her: nice to meet you to. I'm good how are you
Me: you wanna make out


From this point she's gonna say yes or no. If its a no just move on to the next one.

LOL,

Eric has a better handle on things than the last post. I'm also doing some online dating, as well occasionally a friend comes in with a hookup. I met a woman online and things seem to be clicking amazingly for us. I'm a little leary since I've been burned a few times, but know that I can't let that hurt the relationship. That would be letting a few previous girls that lied from the start get the better of me in the current one. Be willing to accept what happened in the past as ...the past.

Friends had a girl I was meeting Friday night at a birthday party. I heard a while into the party that she may not make it. The friends would set something else up. All good. She did make it, being at a restaurant/bar we were in a seperate room for the party, this girl arrived and never came into the room. She sat at the bar with a couple of friends. I got the word that she was shy, walked over and nicely introduced myself. Giving her plenty of room to be shy. The girl hardly said 10 words to me, although I did give her time/space while chatting with her married friend (husband). Without looking back at why she seemed to be flakey I didn't give it a second thought.

Sunday I was at St. Patty's party and next thing I know I'm told someone thinks I'm good looking. Try to talk to her a bit and it didn't seem that she was interested. Ok, nothing lost there either. She leaves later on and it's all good. Next thing I know her friend asks me what I think of that girl, I leave with the number and now I'm FB friends with the married one that asked me about her friend. She had run a race, drank like crazy and then got up and drank more.. maybe she wasn't on her game. Cute though. So I'll see if she's interested. Sounds like she chatted with the friend enough, we'll see.

Like Eric said, be nice, say hi.. you'll never know.

Originally Posted by Erics00LS

thus my "sack up and do it"

If the last half dozen posts don't give an abundant supply of confidence.. then idk what will..

Tons and TONS of info and advice/help. And Erics you know how to be a boss. So ya reading everything again I can see that of I talk to her ill find out for sure what she thinks of me. I'll go for it, I'll see what happens and if she says no. Then I well, I don't know why to say other than I'm taking all that advice and Putin it in play. Confidence is what I have been lacking but now I just won't give into this fear of rejection. I'm just going to go to do instead of just watch

Tomorrow we need an update of you talking to said Woman, your mission Troop is to make vocal contact with the Female Target. Don't give up the fight Soldier!!!

you realize you have a lot of peoples hopes up and expectations.. do the deed my man... you got this.. nothing too it but words that will come from your mouth.. do it to it!

Well today was not bad or good. Today i could not talk to her, and i mean COULD NOT. Not nervous, but because i never got the chance. I was so wanting to talk to her especially since i really did want help for the mid term cause it is kinda hard for me to study for it. Before class she showed up late but so was the teacher, i could not just go up to talk cause the whole class was right there and it was so quit and would have been so weird. During class i could not because of the discussion we were having and it sucks cause i wanted to compliment her on her really great looking dress she was wearing. And after class i was so going for it and i did not care if she was going to say no or not i just wanted to talk to her BUT the teacher was passing back our essays and she got hers first and left and i did not get mine until like 14 people later. Then i could leave, seriously i want to talk to her and i could not cause she got to leave before me. And when before i was so nervous to talk to her we got to leave at the same time, and today when i was looking so forward to talking the teacher decides to let people go when they get their essay back. By the time i was outside she was around the orner and gone, i go a differ way so i could not catch up to her.

BUT it was not a total bust, there is this other girl in class who i noticed a couple of times looking at me. Now i dont really notice if she does or not, but she seems nice and very pretty too but i like this other girl better. But anyways after class when i was walking she walked the same way and next to me but walked faster than me ( is wrong with me im getting lazy, i walk fast as hell and now i walk slow). I wanted to ask a ? so i said "hey" and she did not hear me and nervous as i was i think i said it to low(And i dont know her name). I caught up and said hey again, and she did listen to me and i asked her if she had the book (The one we reading and it was a stupid ? i ask cause everyne has it) And so i ask about the mid term i needed to know and she answsered it to me nicely but she i think seemed to be a bit nervous i think. I know i was talking to her but i think she was too. How i can tell was cause she was occupied on her phone and did not make eye contact with me. She was yet talking to me and she cussed a few times like about the assiggment and i remember a friend telling me that when someone cuss when talking to someone its cause either they are nervous, or want to act tough, or both. Either way she did try to make eye contact but she did not seem to want to. I think she was nervous and she kept a distance from me but before she went her way and i went mine she tried to get closer but i had to go a differ way. I said cya to her and she did too i think but very low and well i think she was nervous, what do you guys think?

So ya i kinda want to talk to the other girl more but now i dont know, i think both look very nice and well seeing what you guys have said before it looks like im nervous to talk to girls cause im concentrated on finding "The One". Im thinking that i should just talk to one or both of em and see who appeals to me the most. from there i guess i should so what all people do to find "The One" and thats go on a date, hang out and get to know each other more. Which ever the one i talk to on thursday, how could i get there number? I wanted to atleast be able to get there # some hows cause its spring break next week. And well i wanted to talk to one of them and get that so we could like talk, but what is the best way to do so and not be weird or any thing? Im thinking about asking after class something like if they are doing anything over it or would like to talk about something in class. Or you guys think just wait untill after spring break and well after that i have a like two months untill end of semester so what do you guys think. Now i am willing to go for it i just need a way to do it without being weird or creepy or anything.

Oh ya and BTW, is it ok to ask a girl for her number even if its the same day we meet?

well saw that you posted and my hopes got high.. i wouldn't say they were completely crushed because you couldn't help that the teacher dismissed class the way they did. props on talking to A GIRL at least today. see its not as bad as it seems. that girl was definitely nervous though and probably very surprised that you even talking. as i wrote a few pages back.. if you know her name... use social media to your advantage and add her on fb or twitter or something. start a convo about anything with her that would be a mutual subject to talk about (class, mid term, school, etc.) the last two girls that i got numbers from is doing this way. one i met the night before and chatted with for maybe 2 minutes and she added me on twitter (granted we both were flirting pretty hardcore) and what not and on my way home for spring break the next day i messaged her with a question that we talked about the night before and chatted all the way home and eventually said hey, you should text me and here's my number.. they'll usually text you or like this girl did.. she wouldn't text me first.. so i said give me your number than.. and then we chatted the whole spring break week and are now gonna be hanging out soon.. its not hard at all.. another another one too with a different girl.. it was her birthday and i only talked and was around her for maybe 5 minutes and i messaged her happy birthday! and she started messaging me back.. granted though that i got inside info that she had a thing for me and what not so i thought i'd see how that went and after messaging on twitter for a while i said you should text me instead and she texted me 2 minutes later and wing go! i'd say it doesn't get easier than that... and especially if you have trouble and get nervous with face-to-face talking with girls.. go this route to start. i'm a communications major also.. so take that how you want....

as far you are saying you wanna find 'the one'.. dude.. you are young.. have fun in college. single is fun and i know having someone to be yours and locked down is a lot of fun too. but don't be so worried about finding the one.. see how different girls are and what you like and don't like.. have some experiences and some memories.. if you do find a girl that you just love and have a good feeling about... keep her around and make things work and sure.. she might eventually turn into 'the one'. its college.. you have a lot of opportunities to have fun and make memories.. don't worry about just picking one girl.. don't worry about anything. i'd say you should try and get a number from one of the two before break.. and if they aren't going somewhere for spring break.. and they are close enough.. sure.. you maybe could see if they would want to hang out sometime... in my case.. this girl lived in Wisconsin and it was a hell of a long ways away to go.. so i just said.. we should hang out when we get back to the cities and school and just be in communication with them through break. ask them questions. call it middle schoolish or whatever but we've taken turns texting questions back and forth.. its great to get to know each other that way.. tell them to ask you any questions.. show them you are willing to open up to them and share some deep stuff with them after texting a while. just get to know them.. and absorb everything you talk about.. like said in a few posts above... absorb every bit of info because you can come back and use that when communicating with them. girls love when you can recall and use info about them in convos. i could tell you more and more stories of how i did swing with the women but i'm not gonna jack your thread.. i've hooked up with about 10 girls in less than a year at college.

but again. props to chatting with a female today.. not bad.. base off of today and get better tomorrow. "practice" on other girls if you wanna call it that.. any other girls in classes.. sit next to them and just have conversations with them.. don't worry about what they think of you or nervous.. just have fun in college.. you won't know what you really like unless you experience it.

Originally Posted by SF9777

Oh ya and BTW, is it ok to ask a girl for her number even if its the same day we meet?

depends on the girl.. some would be fine with it other might be creeped out... if there is vaild reason (homework, study, or they are really into you.) they'll usually fork it up. if they don't.. don't worry.. be persistent.. my first girlfriend (ex now) i pursued for over a year in highschool .. i wouldn't advise you to do what i did then . girls like a chase and you might have to give it to them if they are something you really want.