Got it
It took much blood, sweat, tears, and lots of cursing. But it finally started to budge, and then came loose.
This handy little tool is what made it possible...
http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_1...0070921x00003a
I ran my finger around the edges of the mating surface to feel if it was ok, and a black, torn gasket fell out. There's already a red one in the purolator in my hand, so I guess the guy who changed my oil previously didnt check for the old gasket when he removed the old filter... because this black gasket fits directly over the red one on the purolator.
Yay for inheriting other people's mistakes!
Question is, there's no gasket that's supposed to be in the mating surface on the car, is there? Whatever fell out of there has to be from an old filter, right?